It has been 21 days since i left home, 10 days since dad left and ive been on my own and have to say that i feel .. Lonely already. I did make friends and they always seem to wanna go out and have fun but i miss the parts of me that i left back in kuwait.
I miss my family, i even miss the noise my baby sister used to make, her annoying nagging and the way shez always yelling. I even miss hearing mom screams her lungs out at the maids or my baby sister. When i opened my eyes this morning, i felt so sore when i realized that im in the apartment alone.
I miss my family gatherings, the one i used to force myself into attending them. I miss my friends, i miss my friends so bad.
I can totally see that my new life will be a better life, its promising and i can see me feeling alot happier here than back home but part of me is resisting it, refusing to let go.. More like afraid of letting go.. Even when i know good things are coming my way, im just afraid of moving on..
So far, alot of ppl gave me good reasons to let go, some did it in a good motivating way, some did it in the most painful ways..
I know i should be stronger, i know i should move on.. I know i should let go and leave it all behind.. Start going forward and stop those constant look backs .. But i cant help feeling ths way.. I cant stop the tears and the aching.. I cant stop the self destruction.. I cant stop myself from doing the same mistake all over again
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