To belong

What drives you? Passion? Anger? Fear?

Being in one of the world's busiest subway system in a rush hour made me realize something. 

It was around 5pm in one of new york city subways.. It was literally packed and we were on the subway for atleast an hour! So many people jumped in and out! Ppl from different ethnic backgrounds and ages.

What caught my attention was a young black guy, prolly in his mid 20's, wearing a hoodie covering his head, headphones on and had alot of those rubberbands around his wrist, like the live strong ones..

Another guy that got my attention was prolly some one a bit older, wearing a black hoodie, a baseball cap and he had a tattoo all over his body..

Little things that we take for granted when we look at others.. Accessories.. Outfits and even attitudes that ppl adapt in order to be accepted by others.. I think the fear and pain of being alone is one of the biggest drives.

Everyone wants to belong to some one or somewhere.. People do crazy stuff in order to impress others to be accepted. People work their life off in order to make a certain income to belong to a certain social group. People try to live by the rules of the community to avoid being shun. 

People change in order to be accepted by others. We cant deny our need for belonging and our fear of being alone. I bet all of us had to go through amd endure things in order to belong somewhere .

I personally had to rip my own skin off me and became something that ive always feared n resented in order to be accepted. broke every single rule n principle of mine because i was so afraid of being alone. Ive became something that i'm not, only to belong to some one/something/somewhere..

Everyone is afraid of being stranded and lonely..  

What have you given away or endured to avoid being alone n to belong to something?

T.O vs NYC

Toronto vs NYC!

Toronto might not be as exciting as NYC but its definitely MORE DECENT!! Canada feels like the good polite lil boy while NYC felt like the bad ass homeless boy. Lets do a lil comparison here!

Torontonions are known to be very busy and not friendly but comparing to NYC, omg torontion are extremely friendly lol! Ppl in NYC were pushing us around n rarely seen smiling. In Toronto, ppl do smile and greet you and definitely people are waay more helpful. They would offer to help carrying your heavy stuff and would always offer to help you with directions if you seemed lost

Toronto is so clean with recycling trash bins everywhere as the standard trashbin. The subway system is less complicated and definitely bigger subway cars and more colorful. There are designated areas for elderly, pregnant ladies and handicaps and ppl do respect that. The subways in NYC were really really dirty, not handicaps friendly and the subway cars had less seating areas.

Immigrants. Both cities were multicultural thats for sure. You'll be striked by the number of asians in toronto the same way latinos in NYC will strike you. There were lots of indians and african americans in NY while the majority of dark skinned people in toronto are Ethiopian or Somalians. Definitely toronto feels safer! Ppl are well dressed and presenting well. In NYC, you can see misery and evidence of their struggle on ppl's faces! Its so clear that it breaks your heart!  

Islam, while you see a "halal" shawrma/gyros cart at EVERY corner in NYC, ive rarely seen ladies with hijab! Definitely met alot of Egyptians working there but hijab in manhattan was rarely seen unlike in Toronto! 

I dont know, NYC made me feel miserable! It was hard for me not to notice the struggle of new yorkers and ignore the huge difference of standards of living of the tourists vs the locals! Knowing that and knowing how USA doesnt offer as much services as Canada including health coverages made it hard for me to enjoy it!

Also if you are not into shows, shops and dinning then new york is not your thang!

After this experience, im getting the sense that ill prolly feel the same way about Las Vegas...

Lets hope LA wont disappoint me too.

Its funny how now im having more and more appreciation for living in canada.

P.s: i dont dare to say NYC sucks or boring because im sure that 75% of the world disagree with me. Im just saying that its not my thing :)

New york: last days

ISo we spent the last two days shopping! Well my sister decided so! She has a point, people shop in New York since it has alot of outlets. So we went to a mall in New Jersey and my sister shopped till she was broke and came to me asking for money! I dont understand creatures like her :/. If you cant afford it then DONT BUY IT! She insisted that it was such a good deal blah blah blah! 

At night, we headed to see a broadway show and we ended up seeing the LION KING! Well, dont kill me but i was not impressed lol!  Maybe because i knew the story and maybe because i saw different versions of the lion king musical? Dont get me wrong, i got nothing against musicals, i enjoyed the wizard of Oz when it was in TO but i guess i was expecting more of a lion king show and a show being played in broadway .. Or maybe thats just me!

I mean, i get bored easily, mystery excites me n if i knew the story and seen it done similarly, it will kill the mystery if you know what i mean.

Anyway our last day was spent in Central park! We biked it all and it was almost 9km according to the guy n it took us 2hrs! It is such a beautiful park! It had fall colors all over but it was pretty busy *pouts* 

Im really starting to see that toronto tried so hard to imitate NYC lol! Central park feels like high park! The only difference is that in high park, there sre some hiking trails! 

And we ended up spending the rest of the day souvenirs shopping!

At the end while we were dragging our bags to the subway, the door keeper at the hotel told us to be careful on the subway! He said that there are alot of theft and assaults on busy subways in daylight! Ppl dont care whos around n what time and would assault you if you looked like u got money! He said he would rather pay 80$ for a cab than go on a subway because its dangerous lol!

He really got us but then we were running late and it was rush hour and we knew that a cab will be stuck in traffic for hours so we took the risk! 

Omg! NYC subways are the worst if you are carrying luggage!! Escalators / elevators are not available in every station and theres alot of stairs and the subway is so busy and ppl will rush you while you are trying to carry down your heavy bag down a hundred step :/  my sister as usual has overshopped and her bag was oversized and she was struggling to carry it up n down the stairs! I couldnt leave my bag unattended to help carrying hers so we were in such a ma95ara situation lol!!  La walah at that moment, i felt like cryin coz our bags were heavy n there were too many steps in that narrow stairs n ppl were pushing us around since it was rush hour lol! NYC AINT FRIENDLY AT ALL I TELL U!!

New york - day 3

So we decided to see the rest of new york today .. Or so i thought, my sister had another agenda! 

We started by taking the subway all the way to brooklyn to check brooklyn heights n walked across brooklyn bridge! Then we walked around starting with china town, all the wY through little italy to SoHo! 

Chinatown and lil italy felt like the ones we have in toronto only bigger and busier! I had busy places, its hard for you to stop to look around when you know that theres a long que of people behind you and that by stopping, you could be blocking the way.

We stopped at cafe habana and had grilled mexican corn n it was quite an experience! It was covered with cheese, lime and chili ! Definitely worth getting lost in the streets of lil italy lol.

My sister has a different agenda, she stopped at every boutique and bought her stuff n made me carry em in my pack bag! I was angry most of the day because i didnt come here to shop but also coz it was cold n i couldnt hang outside the shop while she shops since it was that cold! I literally wore everything i had: tshirt, warmshirt, hoodie and a jacket n i was still shaking! 

I dont want to sound grumpy but im still not impressed n i can see why, its my sister's company and all that shopping and the fact that its not green n stuff!

I can see how canada surpasses USA. Not only for their health system but canada is waaay more environment- friendly. Ive rarely seen recycling bins in the streets and most of their streets are dirty. 

I cant say americans coz prolly most of the ppl here are tourists but they are not as polite as Canadians! Ppl push you around and dont apologize, no one stops around to help you with directions when you look lost and no one holds the door for you here :/

Ya 7elo el Canadians wallah! Im starting to really appreciate being in canada and im starting to feel grateful for being accepted here rather in the states.

There is so much that you can learn from them :)

New york

The big apple! The center of the world! The bad ass city 

Maybe

But definitely not my cup of tea

NYC felt like Toronto only bigger, dirtier , busier and definitely out of control.

We spent the first day walking aroubd exploring the city.

Times square was soo crowded and walking around was hard! It felt like hajj to me! Didnt likr the idea of being squeezed within the crowds or not being able to browse the stores because of the crowds! Hated the waiting list in every restuarant in times square and definitely my major turn off was the unfriendliness of peopls here N how everyone is rushing around.

I knew from the start that i wont like it but i thought id give it a chance

I can see why alot of people might like it but definitely not my thing

If living in toronto made me depressed then definitely ill commit suicide if i had to move to NYC.

I loved how you dont pay tax if your purchases are below 110 dollars 

Highlights of day 1 :

Times square : overrated

Wholefood's in NYC: GIGANTIC AND IMPRESSIVE. Loved it

Finally!! Tried chobani!!! It is really yummy!! I dont know why they stopped importing it into canada

Trader Joe's: finally been to one. Absolutely loved the variety n the healthy options of its product! I wish we had TJ in Canada!! *thumbs up*

Highlights of day 2:

Walked around the city.

Been to grand central station who felt like union station in TO only bigger

Walked around 5th avenue . so a street full of high end stores n brands! Whata the big deal? 

Macy's: it was my sister"s idea! Just another department store

Junior's cheese cake: a nice cheese cake store with so many variation! Their cheese cake felt as good as the cheese cake factory if u thought cheese cake factor is good.

Although ive been eating clean n made a commitment not to ruin it but i did n so far, i regret it! Nothing wow-ish here lol! Again, maybe coz we have similar dinning experience in to?

Never the less, i did try most of what people recommended but i wasnt impressed lol

I had the street food/ halal kart food! I had falafal n gyros from the halal guys n it was absolutely disgusting!! The sandwich was filled with mayo that it made me wanna puke after a few bites! Maybe because im not a big fan of mayo? But i was disappointed but i dont regret the experience! These karts are as common as starbucks in NYC so we had to try it

However, i did enjoy something! Its the portobello empanadas from nuchas food cart at times square! It was pricey! 3 dollars for a mini empanadas but they were REALLY good!! Loved em!!!

By the 2nd day, i was still not impressed by NYC! Maybe because i live in a busy city too, toronto is bot as busy as NYC but its still busier than alot of cities with skyscrapers and stuff or maybe because ive never been a fan of busy cities and stuff.